Jaws Unmade

Jaws Unmade: The Lost Sequels, Prequels, Remakes, and Rip-offs by John LeMay, 302 pages

Jaws is sometimes regarded as the first summer blockbuster, and, as such, the prototype for all those that followed.  Whatever caveats ought to be attached to that claim, it was certainly wildly successful (indeed, the highest grossing film in unadjusted dollars to that point) and like successful movies before and since it spawned a legion of imitators, some more flattering than others, from its own sequels and major studios' attempts to bottle the same lightning to the inevitable parade of Italian rip-offs.

Jaws Unmade chronicles these more or less misbegotten children of Bruce, both legitimate and illegitimate, not only describing the movies that did get made but, just as intriguingly, all those projects that miscarried.  There are the well-known early versions of Jaws 2, one featuring Quint's son and another angry mobsters.  There's MST3K favorite Devilfish (aka Monster Shark, not to be confused with Bert I Gordon's aborted project Devil Fish, which is also discussed).  There's the legendary unmade spoof Jaws 3, People 0, which Universal spent 2.5 million dollars developing before cancelling the project for fear of alienating Steven Spielberg.  There's Bruno Mattei's 1995 film Cruel Jaws, sometimes marketed as Jaws 5 ("This time it's even more personal than the last time."), which piles on subplot after subplot seemingly without purpose, until, that is, you learn that the main plot rips off 1981's The Last Shark to the point of actually stealing entire sequences of footage.  There's Joe Dante working on Piranha and James Cameron working on Piranha II and John Sayles working on anything that pays the bills.  There's Roger Corman and Dino De Laurentiis and a surprise appearance by John Carpenter.  There's George Clooney and Laura Dern getting eaten by a giant grizzly bear.

If this is your idea of fun, it is tremendous fun.  It isn't clear how extensive or accurate LeMay's research is (his cites sometimes go no further than an IMDB trivia page), and the book is riddled with homophonic errors that suggest the proofreading was limited to a spellcheck, but the author's love of this material, as misplaced as it seems at times, is truly infectious.

East

East by Edith Pattou, 498 pages 

East is a lengthy retelling of the classic fairy tale "East of the Sun and West of the Moon."  The likeable protagonist Rose is a north born child.  This means she is destined for traveling, wandering ways and adventure.  It also means she is a bit of a challenge to her parents who had hoped she would be a biddable East born daughter.   Switching perspectives between Rose, her brother, and her father allows the reader to see Rose from the vantage point of those who love her.  Unfortunately, these added perspectives slow down the pacing of the book and do not contribute enough to the plot to make their presence necessary.  The only shifting perspective that really adds anything to Rose's story is that of the White Bear.  The reader first means the mysterious White Bear when it rescues Rose from a frozen lake as a toddler.  Over the years, the connection between girl and bear grows, until one night the White Bear appears at Rose's front door and offers to take her away in exchange for a life free of want for her parents and siblings.  Despite her family's objections, Rose goes with the White Bear not only to save them but because of her own wanderlust and the strange connection she feels with the bear.

The story then slows down considerably as Rose and the White Bear live together in a hidden mountain lodge which she thinks of as a castle.  She relates her daily life in the castle as it is filled with sewing beautiful gowns, learning to communicate with the bear, enjoying his instrument room, and sleeping with a mysterious, unidentified stranger each night.  Oh, and there are trolls and a strange troll drink called slank that manages to enrapture any who consume it.  The action doesn't pick up again until Rose decides to stay up one night to figure out her bedfellow.  By the light of her candle, she realizes the man who shares her bed is none other than the White Bear in man form!  Then, she drops the tallow on his shirt,  harkening for the Troll Queen to come claim her prize.  The man is whisked away, and Rose is left alone and lonely.  She immediately embarks on a epic journey across land, snow and ice to reunite with her White Bear.  This is by far the most engaging part of the book as Rose encounters a variety of characters along the way from Njord (Norway) and Fransk (France) to Greenland and Huldre (the troll kingdom) and finds her own courage and strength as she battles the elements for survival.  She eventually reunites with the White Bear now known as Myk (in human form).  I won't give away any more of the ending in case anyone is unfamiliar with the tale, but let's just say I was a little disappointed.  In addition to all her other life skills, it seems Rose's two most important attributes are her ability to sew well and wash garments.  People interested in reading all possible fairy tale retellings might be interested in reading East, otherwise this version does little to improve on the original.