Really Bad Girls of the Bible

Really Bad Girls of the Bible by Liz Curtis Higgs                   Ebook: 604 pages                          

Another good book by Liz Curtis Higgs.    In this book she relates fictional stories set in modern times along the themes of some of the noted and some notorious women of the Bible.   The Biblical women she discusses in this book are the Witch of En Dor who called up the spirit of the prophet Samuel and was chastised for going against God’s teaching,  Athaliah who was so attached to the throne that after her husband died she began killing off family members down through her grandchildren just so she could keep her position as ruler,  wicked woman!  Herodias, who married her Uncle and then left him for his brother and married him (her other uncle) and went into a rage when John the Baptist started calling her and her husband out as adulterers.   Herodias is the mother of Salome,  the one with the veils and floozy dance moves.  Herodias got her daughter to excite her step-dad so much with those erotic gyrations that he offered her anything she wanted up to half his kingdom – the girl must have been young and naïve – she asked her mother what she should ask for and Herodias told her John the Baptist’s head.  She did and since Step-Papa made the declaration in front of all of his buds at his birthday bash – he kept his end of the bargain.   Evil females.   Bathsheba who King David saw cleansing herself in the bath (per Judaic teachings – it was after her menses and it was way after dark) one night when he was up on his roof.    Bathsheba has always got a bad rap down through history but if you think about it, she was obeying the custom of the time.   She waited till everyone was asleep.   She went to the place designated for cleansing and purifying oneself after menses otherwise she would have been considered unclean and untouchable by  Judaic law.   The Bible doesn’t say she was flaunting her stuff because some fellow might be watching – she did what she was supposed to.   Her husband was a soldier in King David’s army and a loyal supporter of the King.   Long story short, David got the hots for Bathsheba and ends up sending her husband to the front line during the war which led to his demise so David could claim Bathsheba and take her as his wife.   She did bare him children and David while beloved of God prior to that slip was chastised but also through this union became the father of Solomon the wisest man ever and the predessor of the line of ancestry to Jesus.   No where does it say Bathsheba was vamping him to get there so it feels like she was a victim.   When the King says so it must be, hey, peons have no say and no rights – Kings rules.   So, her inclusion in this book of wild wicked women has a caveat for sure.   Jael, who single-handedly drove a tent spike through an evil Canaanite King’s head through stealthy smooth conniving moves to lull him into sleep then BANG!  Dead bad guy.  She achieved what the entire army of Jewish men could not.    Harsh action but tough times call for tough measures.   Sounds like she saved her people, that ranks hero in my thinking.   (Xena yell!  Viking Yell!)  I don’t see her as a bad person, she did what was prophesied – the girl is a warrior!     Tamar married a son of Judah who went looking for love in another people’s town.   God wasn’t for that, because the other town were idol worshipers but Judah was a rebel yet still loved by God.   Back in that time, if a man died before he could produce offspring then his brother by law was to come forward and make a baby for the dead brother.   Ewww.   So, obeying the law Judah had his next son step up to the plate so to speak.   Well, the son had other ideas and without getting too graphic I will use the words of the Bible which say he had relations with Tamar but withdrew and spilled his seed on the ground so he would not impregnate her – he was already married and not into this forced stuf.   However, by so doing he disobeyed the law and was smited for it.   Now there are two dead sons.    Next up – still a no go.    He, too, was inot for giving a kid up for his brother (didn’t want to take one for the team).    The last son was so young Judah told Tamar you will have to wait 7 years for him to be old enough.   In the meantime Judah decided forget her he wasn’t giving his last son up in case there was some curse on her that killed his kids  and so on.   Smite  for disobeying, and for good measure Judah’s wife got smited, too.   Now Judah was all alone.    Tamar had to go back home to live with her folks during this time but the gal was plucky she was NOT going to give up.   She was going to get her justice and her baby.    So, she dolled herself up like a prostitute complete with several veils covering her face and sat outside the City gate waiting for Judah to come by – she was aware of his goings and comings routine.    Again, long story short, she ended up pregnant by her father-in-law Judah and had twin boys.   So God doubly blessed her for all the hassle she had to go through.    The author cracked me up because the transaction transpired like this – Judah is macking, “Hey Baby, let’s go *@(#&(@#.   Tamar – smart business woman asks, “What will you give me?”   He asks what she wants?   She says his walking stick and the thing he stamps his seal with (Like his signature mark).   He says he will also send her a goat from his flock.   I cracked up when the author wrote, “Yeah, the goat is in the mail, right!”   He admits his wrong going and Tamar is vindicated and not burnt alive as he first suggested before he found out his Big Daddy.   The last two ladies mentioned are the lady caught in adultery that the chief priests and males in town were going to stone to death but through her at Jesus’feet and asked him what he thought about her being killed for adultery.   (Excuse me, where was the man – ie. the other half of the adultery equation, huh?   What only the women gets killed?   Patriarchal societies! Hmmmph!)    Jesus didn’t even look at any of them just doodled in the dirt with his finger then after a little while said, “He who is without sin cast the first stone.”   Welllllllllll!   They weren’t ready for that.   Jesus kept drawing not looking up when he did all of the men had gone.   He said, “Woman, where are your accusers?  Has no man condemned you”     She answered, “No man, Lord.”    Then Jesus told her, “Neither do I condemn you, go and sin no more.”   O.K.  we don’t know the back story, did she love the guy?   Were they both married?    Was it lascivious lust or were they star-crossed lovers married against their will to people they didn’t want?   It doesn’t say she was a prostitute, and the big question – was this a setup to try and trap Jesus?   The flouted Mosaic law at him, afterall.   Maybe she did, maybe she was just caught up and some guy grabbed her and made it look like it was something it wasn’t – we don’t know – but I can’t put her in the same category as Herodias nor Athaliah and lucky for her, neither did Jesus and He forgave her sins.    She may very well have gotten a bad rap and was framed.   Or maybe she did do it, but, God forgave her.   Last but not least is Veronica, the lady who had been troubled with an issue of blood for 12 years and remember  according to Judaic law that made her unclean and untouchable sort of a pariah.   Not quite a leper but you get the idea.    She had such stong belief that she knew in her heart if she could just touch the hem of Jesus’ robe she would be healed of her affliction.    So she followed him and worked her way through the crowd as he and his disciples were walking.    She bent down and barely touched His robe.   He was facing away from her so she barely touched the bottom of his robe from behind him and received instant healing.    Jesus felt healing power go out of him and asked who touched Him?   His disciples are like – probably half the people in this crowd.   It’s a crowd, who knows who touched you.   Then hearing Him, the woman trembling fell down before Him and confessed it was her and why she did it and how she was immediately healed.    Jesus said to her, “Daughter, be of good comfort, your faith has made you whole, go in peace.”    O.K. she didn’t ask if she could touch Him, but, being unclean she was likely treated like dirt and afraid to ask thinking she might be dismissed.   Taking a chance to go unobserved yet get healing from her health problem she took a chance.   Maybe Jesus just wanted to acknowledge her and let her know it was o.k.   But it turned out good for her and she wasn’t in trouble, so, I don’t think she was really a bad person for doing that without permission, although, she probably ought to have asked, He was real good about forgiving the poor and downtrodden, though.   Halleluiah, good news for all of us.     Good book and that “the goat is in the mail” thing still cracks me up every time I think of it.   Liz Curtis Higgs is a good writer but more than that she makes the reader have fun reading her works.    Well done!