Mother Teresa: Come Be My Light

Mother Teresa: Come Be My Light: The Private Writings of the "Saint of Calcutta" by Mother Teresa, edited and with commentary by Brian Kolodiejchuk, MC, 404 pages

"In my heart there is no faith...  no trust - there is so much pain..."

These words probably wouldn't raise many eyebrows, except when they are written by a world-famous nun, a beata of the Catholic Church, a woman regarded by many during her lifetime as a "living saint".  Nor were they written in her youth or in an isolated moment of crisis, rather, they were the result of a "dark night" that lasted decades, beginning shortly after the founding of the Missionaries of Charity.  When some of these writings became public, there were loud voices which proclaimed Bl Teresa of Calcutta a fraud who had proclaimed God to the world despite not believing in Him herself.

"Edited and with commentary" is a bit of an understatement, since Father Kolodiejchuk's contribution probably constitutes over half of the actual text, but this is no Pale Fire.  The commentary is absolutely necessary in order to link together an extremely heterogeneous collection of journal entries, letters, and retreat notes.  What emerges is a deeply compelling portrait of a soul seeking her Spouse on a cross and fully inhabiting His words, "I thirst."  In the popular imagination saints are often imagined as credulous persons who ask no questions.  This book reveals perhaps the most visible modern "saint" as a woman who daily lived in despair and yet, greater even than faith, kept her love.

"I no longer pray. - My soul is not one with You - and yet when alone in the streets - I talk to You for hours - of my longing for You. - How intimate are those words..."